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Post by dancingwind on Sept 3, 2005 6:13:55 GMT
Spiritual Jokes
This guy was climbing a tree when suddenly he slipped, then grabbed at a branch and was hanging there. After an hour or so had passed he felt himself getting exhausted and looked up to the heavens and cried out: "God, help me, please, help me." All of a sudden the clouds parted and a voice boomed out from on high. "Let Go!" said the voice. The guy paused and looked up at heaven once more, then said: "Is there anyone else up there?"
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Post by stef on Sept 3, 2005 9:32:13 GMT
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D love stef
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 3, 2005 10:00:00 GMT
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D love stef Yeah, this one was great.. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D love, Brigitte
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 4, 2005 5:38:52 GMT
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D When two psychic friends met, one said: "You are fine. How am I ?"
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 6, 2005 6:19:13 GMT
Spiritual Jokes
We got that one off the alt.Yoga newsgroup
Two men meet on the street. One asks the other: "Hi, how are you?" The other ones replies: "I'm fine, thanks." "And how's your son? Is he still unemployed?" "Yes, he is. But he is meditating now." "Meditating? What's that?" "I dont know. But it's better than sitting around and do nothing!"
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Post by stef on Sept 9, 2005 12:26:00 GMT
A priest and bus driver lived together and one day they also together died. They go to st. Peter standing before heaven gate. He allows the bus driver to go to one of the highest heavens but the priest has to wait. He waits for long time and finaly goes to st. Peter and asks: "Why could that bus driver go to the highest heaven and I, who all my life spoke about God, have to wait for such a long time?" St. Peter said: "When you were speaking to the people at your church everybody was sleeping, but when that bus driver was driving everybody prayed!"
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 15, 2005 5:07:25 GMT
How to you make God laugh? Tell him your plans.
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 16, 2005 6:36:57 GMT
How do you make God laugh? Say: "This is mine".
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 17, 2005 6:37:25 GMT
What makes God laugh? When a doctor tells his patient: "I cured you"
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 18, 2005 5:04:45 GMT
New York's Lawyer Goes To Hell
A New York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him "What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?"
The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street." Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the record, and after a moment Gabriel affirmed that this was true. Saint Peter said, "Well, that's fine, but it's not really quite enough to get you into Heaven." The Lawyer said, "Wait! There's more! Three years ago I also gave a homeless person a quarter." Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who after a moment nodded back, affirming this, too, had been verified.
Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we do with this fellow?" Gabriel gave the Lawyer a sidelong glance, then said to Saint Peter, "Let's give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell."
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 20, 2005 6:45:24 GMT
Where is Jesus Today? ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
A Sunday school teacher of preschoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred for real.
He asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?"
Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."
Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart."
Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know, I know! He's in our bathroom!!!"
The whole class got very quiet, looked at the teacher, and waited for a response. The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long seconds.
Finally, he gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how he knew this.
Little Johnny said, "Well . . . every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yell s,
"Good Lord, are you still in there?!"
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Post by stef on Sept 20, 2005 13:00:28 GMT
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D love stef
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 20, 2005 14:29:23 GMT
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 21, 2005 6:40:36 GMT
God's Face
A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's artwork. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the little girl replied, "They will in a minute."
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Post by dancingwind on Sept 23, 2005 7:09:45 GMT
Six-year old Angie and her four-year old brother, Joel, were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had enough. "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church." "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked. Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door? They're hushers"
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