Post by suryakant on Aug 21, 2008 4:25:54 GMT
Disclaimer: The following attunement procedure
has no connection whatsoever to any form of Reiki,
and is presented here purely in a spirit of playful fun,
you KNUCKLEHEAD! ;D
Are you a Reiki practitioner or Reiki master?
Do you take yourself and Reiki too seriously?
If you do, here's a sure cure for your too-serious attitude! ;D
Three Stooges Attunement Procedure
(1) Stand behind the numbskull,
place both hands on top of their head,
and say in a sing-song, whiney, high-pitched voice,
"Laa-DEEEEE, Daa-Dee-DAAAAA!"
(2) Visualize The Curly Symbol
going up and down in the air
over the numbskull's head
as you flutter your right hand up and down
while saying in a sing-song, whiney, high-pitched voice,
"WOOB-OOB-OOB, WOOB! WOOB! WOOB!"
(3) With your fluttering right hand,
guide The Curly Symbol
to the base of the back
of the numbskull's head,
and then turn the numbskull into a knucklehead
by giving their skull a noogie
while saying in a very nasal tone,
"NYYYAAAAAHH!!!"
(4) While saying
"Laa-DEEEEE, Daa-Dee-DAAAAA!"
in a whiney, sing-song, high-pitched voice,
walk around to the front of the knucklehead,
hold their hands palms-up in one of your hands,
and with your other hand,
draw The Curly Symbol over the knucklehead's hands ---
then slap the knucklehead's hands three times while saying
"NYUK! NYUK! NYUK!"
(5) While saying
"Laa-DEEEEE, Daa-Dee-DAAAAA!"
in a whiney, sing-song, high-pitched voice,
put the knucklehead's hands together in prayer-position
and position them between the knucklehead's eyes ---
then make the first two fingers of one of your hands form a "V"
and thrust that "V" forcibly three times
onto the knucklehead's prayer-positioned hands while saying
"NYUK! NYUK! NYUK!"
(6) Stand back and face the knucklehead ---
take a deep breath and exhale forcibly towards the knucklehead three times
while making a wheezy rasping barking sound like
"RUFF! RUFF! RUFF!"
(7) While saying
"Laa-DEEEEE, Daa-Dee-DAAAAA!"
in a whiney, sing-song, high-pitched voice,
walk around to the back of the knucklehead,
place both hands on top of their head,
and say in a loud, whiney, sing-song voice,
"Is this attunement complete? SOIT' IN' LY !!!"
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
